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I go to OA meetings once a week. I go because it's not just about the food and exercise for me, it's also about trying to fix my emotional well-being with food. So often I reach for something to put into my mouth when I'm feeling sad, happy, angry or embarrassed. I don't grok all the OA (or 12 step, for that matter) dogma and I have an issue with powerlessness. I believe that leads to irresponsibility and blame-placing for some. I am powerless over the craving that some food causes me (sugar begets more sugar), but I'm certainly not powerless over my choices and decisions. I do believe in writing a 4th step to find the root of resentment and figuring out my trigger areas, though, which I've worked on this past week. And I'm pissed off at about 1/2 dozen people, which was surprising to me, as I thought I had let go of the anger and resentment from past hurts. Guess not. And guess I'm still eating over them. Huh.
So, the point of this is the OA meetings are attended by several people who have other addictions, but food happens to be something they overindulge in and because the 12 steps have worked with their other addictions, they come to the OA meetings, then proceed to talk about food in great detail, planting a seed of desire in my gut and making each and every Saturday a challenge. I'm upset that I react so viscerally to these people, but dammit, when they talk about foods that happen to be favorites of mine with such waxing romantic terminology, of course I'm going to have the desire to indulge.
The mean part of me wants to describe the beer I drank with dinner the other night, the frosty cold mug, the perfect head, the squirt of lime and that first crisp and delightfully cold sip. But I won't because that will be seen as being "catty".
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261 kcal
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Fat: 16.38g | Prot: 9.61g | Carbs: 22.70g.
Breakfast: crispbread rye, peanut butter. more...
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Hi, Interesting take on OA, I've never been but have thought about it because to me food is an addiction. Food isn't my only addiction but it is the one I'm currently acting out on. Do you think the meetings help? I may check it out.
27 Apr 08 by member: motherdog
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Not to sound dumb....but what is OA?
27 Apr 08 by member: Mommyray
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The meetings do help me. I eat for a variety of reasons, hunger being the last for the most part. The 12 steps have helped me take a look at myself and get to know myself by showing me patterns of behaviors that have resulted in unhealthy coping techniques. When I want to eat something compulsively it is usually because I'm feeling something, a good or bad emotion, and I've taught myself that putting food into my mouth helps stifle that emotion for a while. But it really doesn't. I'm trying to unlearn those things, slowly.
27 Apr 08 by member: vonnielee
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OA is Overeaters Anonymous, a 12 step program. Google it for lots and lots of information.
27 Apr 08 by member: vonnielee
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Very interesting. Thank-you for sharing a bit about the meetings and what they are about as well as some of your own experiences.
27 Apr 08 by member: massiverally
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Quote
"So, the point of this is the OA meetings are attended by several people who have other addictions, but food happens to be something they overindulge in and because the 12 steps have worked with their other addictions, they come to the OA meetings, then proceed to talk about food in great detail, planting a seed of desire in my gut and making each and every Saturday a challenge. I'm upset that I react so viscerally to these people, but dammit, when they talk about foods that happen to be favorites of mine with such waxing romantic terminology, of course I'm going to have the desire to indulge.
The mean part of me wants to describe the beer I drank with dinner the other night, the frosty cold mug, the perfect head, the squirt of lime and that first crisp and delightfully cold sip. But I won't because that will be seen as being "catty". "
I totally understand...I think it's a little dangerous to be talking about specific foods during meetings. Is it possible to have a group rule where specifics aren't mentioned? Could it be "food of choice" instead? I know from working in addictions that when I run groups, I have to make this a room rule so that people can feel safe and not triggered. Hang in there...you are doing some great (and hard) work!!
27 Apr 08 by member: StumpsMom
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I've never been to an OA meeting but I can tell you I've been to many support groups, from single moms to parents who lost children to parents of children with cancer....and more, BUT the thing I always found in many support groups is that they are best when you are first experiencing whatever it is the group supports, because they do tend to talk about the issues that brought them there. I've been to some where they do seem to dwell rather than support progress and healing. If there's a moderator, perhaps you can discuss it with them? Maybe you've outgrown that group and you could start a new positive thinking, forward on approach group? you are a go getter! I'm sure whatever you want to do, you can do! Aren't you glad you have pals here that can all relate to you and you have a forum to vent? Have a great evening!
27 Apr 08 by member: ImLuuvd
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StumpsMom wrote: <i>I totally understand...I think it's a little dangerous to be talking about specific foods during meetings. Is it possible to have a group rule where specifics aren't mentioned? Could it be "food of choice"</i>
Yes, that is the format that should be followed during the meetings. We have a core group of 9-10 people and the meeting format has gotten relaxed. I spoke to the meeting leader and we agree that we need to address this issue, ASAP.
ImLuuvd: There is a saying for all 12 step programs: Take what you like and leave the rest. Sometimes I get 2 minutes out of a meeting that I like and I forget about the rest of the stuff, as it's just not worth it to chew over and dissect, sometimes the whole meeting is good from start to finish and I come away knowing that I'm doing exactly what I need to be doing. The meetings are only a small part of my recovery, when looked at from a distance. Part of my food addiction is the tendency to isolate and believe that I'm so different from others, and getting out to a meeting helps break that one pattern of behavior that I don't like.
I started in Al-Anon 4 years ago, that was my introduction to 12 steps. I have done one 4th step (a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves), but have found that almost 2 years after doin the 4th, 5th and 6th step, I have issues that have not been resolved and I eat to stifle them. Doing the OA program is helping me take another look into myself, which is a good thing.
And YES, I'm so happy I have fatsecret as another way to keep track of the physical part of this journey, as well as making new friends to discuss all the STUFF with in the journal and forum. Thank you for taking the time to comment!! :)
28 Apr 08 by member: vonnielee
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