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I find that my hubby is unfair to me. we both have been diagnosed with health conditions this year and for both of us it's as a result of our lifestyle. my love has his own thoughts, opinions and preferance on how he wants to get healthy and I have my own. the unfair part is that he insists I do things his way and he demands that groceries accomodate his condition. I'm mostly in agreement about making sure that we buy only food that is helpful to both of us. where I disagree with him is where he refuses to budge. his ways after based on old school thinking and do no accomodate any of the latest research that have proven to be helpful to patients with his condition. the best part is that both of us will benefit from my action plan. he has tried his approach for years and he's never had success on it. but my plan lots of people have had success but he absolutely refuses to even consider the research. as much as I want him to join me on my plan, I understand and respect that we're two different people wanting to improve our health but we're doing it from different approaches and there's nothing wrong with that. the thing we need to figure out is the balance that with work for us as a couple. the friction comes in where he gets upset with my plans for myself and we have had fights about what I feel is right for me. I even go so far as to adjust what I want to do for myself based on my extensive research and personal anecdotal experience to make him feel comfortable. but fast forward to him making plans for himself. his approach is based on outdated information, he refuses to do research, puts the burden on me to disprove him. when I present information he does not agree with he gets angry and we fight and the final outcome is the blanket demands he makes on our shopping list that I don't agree with and I must just comply. example we must move away from avocado oil to canola oil because it has a heart sticker on it. no oils without heart stickers are now allowed in our house. so I'm forced to eat inflammatory oils because he does not believe that they cause inflammation ('because that does not make sense to him') and they have heart stickers on the bottle. no research whatsoever. I worry that I'm forced to make this change and only for him to continue eating unhealthily at the office or at home when he wants takeaways.i want my husband to be healthy and I want to be healthy too. I've made peace with his approach for himself. I've learned that you cannot convince anyone of anything especially when they have very strong beliefs. And I respect that he is an adult who can make his own decisions about his health and life. somehow I don't feel like I'm given the same courtesy and freedom because my plans are always under scrutiny and lead to many fights and for me to avoid fights I find myself adjusting what I want to do or not sharing in full what I want to do. another example, I'm now not allowed to talk about fasting. if I mention intermittent fasting, we get into a huge fight. like I said I know and accept that I cannot control what he does. I just wish I felt that I had freedom to do what I want for my own health.
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